Last week, on November 6, it was our 9th anniversary of engagement. I was too sick to post this then. I did want to post our engagement story.
Ram came over to my house the night before my birthday. He had one of my friends take me away for about an hour. When I returned he had cooked supper for us. If I remember right, he made pork and steamed broccoli. He had borrowed a few items like a vase for flowers from a seminary couple and gone grocery shopping for the food. He figured out where everything was in my kitchen and cooked. After we ate, he took me in my bedroom. He had put roses on my bed and then he gave me my ring. I love my ring! The engagement ring is one diamond and the wedding ring is three small diamonds. I was so excited that I never really gave Ram a chance to ask the question that night. He got down on his knee and asked me the next week when he had the ring resized. I didn't do much teaching at school the next day because I had to show off my ring to everyone! We managed to keep our engagement a secret for a week until we went to tell my sister in person. Ram left for vicarage a few weeks later so we were apart for a year before our wedding.
I love you Ram, and I'm so glad you asked me to marry you 9 years ago!
Friday, November 13, 2009
Thursday, November 12, 2009
College (CUW vs. RF)
Last week on Loopers, there was a discussion about going to college. I was too sick to join in the conversation then so I thought I would post my story on my blog. I am not posting this story to brag, but I'm hoping it may help the Looper that originally asked the college question.
I studied very hard in school so I had very good grades. I was ranked 3rd in my class in high school until my final semester when I took calculus and physics (yes, I took these for fun!) dropped me to 5th in my class. I did not do fantastic on my ACT or SAT, but my class rank was enough for some colleges to notice. Ball State offered me a full ride of tuition. I didn't want to go there because it had the reputation of being a party school. Looking back, maybe I should have commuted from home and gone to school for free for a year or two.
My parents gave me a lot of freedom for college choice. Basically the only school I wasn't allowed to go to was Valpo because it's not Lutheran!
I applied for a lot of scholarships when I was in high school. I got a lot of small ($500) scholarships which all added up. I did best at ones like American Legion and local ones even though local was the second largest town in Indiana. If I remembered the deadline and applied each year of school, they would usually give me money each year too, even though it was only advertised for high school seniors. These local groups usually have money to give away but people don't apply for it or meet the deadline or have a nice typed letter or whatever reason.
I had gone to Art of Music camp at Concordia, River Forest a few summers while I was in high school. After this I had a fantasy view of Concordia, RF. I really wanted to go there. I wanted to be within walking distance of the city and sightsee Chicago and be part of their great Wind Ensemble and be part of their social life that I saw a small part of those summers at music camp. When the financial aid package came, RF gave me almost nothing. There was no way my parents could afford that kind of tuition.
My dad had worked out a family vacation while I was in high school so we had a tour of Concordia Wisconsin. It was ok, but not my dream school like RF. Right away 1/2 the tuition was paid with an academic scholarship and there were other small scholarships. The problem was it was 6 hours away from home and no one from our area, hardly anyone from our state went there. But the fact that I never had to go outside in the winter was very appealing. The buildings are all connected (dorms, cafeteria, chapel, library, classrooms, everything!)
It was embarrassing at the high school honors banquets to have no idea where I was going to college. Even on graduation day I still didn't know. The first born in me sat down and ran the numbers one more time a few days after graduation. It was obvious that financially CUW would work, RF no way. I tried calling RF and pleading with their financial aid office with not one more penny of success. I called CUW and told them I would be attending there in the fall. I returned a phone call to RF and told them I would be going to CUW and why.
A couple of days later, who should call but RF! How much did CUW give you? Would you still come to RF if we matched CUW? I was furious. I had just called a few days before and tried to work with them without any success. I told them no, I had already agreed to CUW.
It ended up that there were only 6 people from the entire state of Indiana that went to CUW when I was a freshman. I was the only flute in the wind ensemble when I was a freshman. I have no idea if I would have been good enough to even audition for the RF Wind Ensemble. The CUW band director talked a couple of other girls into coming to concerts a few times a year but for most of the year I was the entire flute section! The band director promised me we would go on tour before I graduated. We went to both New Orleans and Atlanta on tours before I graduated.
Financially, after scholarships, it was cheaper my freshman year of college to pay tuition and room and board than what my parents had paid the previous year for my Lutheran high school tuition. That is when I knew I had made the right decision to go to CUW.
My sophomore and junior years cost a little more as some scholarships were one time scholarships. My parents paid my tuition/room and board after scholarships for my first 3 years of college. I was on my own for my senior year because by that point they needed to also pay for my sister's Lutheran high school tuition. By this point college tuition had risen since my freshman year. Plus there were extra expenses of student teaching and graduation. The problem is that the financial aid office doesn't understand at all when your parents have been paying for you and now they won't. I got a very small student loan and had to scramble in my meager savings and do extra babysitting etc. to come up with the rest by the time it was due. I even remember I owed some the last semester and they warned me several times that I wouldn't get my diploma unless it was paid. Thankfully I paid everything on time and got out in 4 years! And I easily paid back my very small school loan the first year after I graduated.
Anyway, I had great friends and I'm really glad that I went to CUW. I'm afraid that I might have been disappointed if I would have picked RF because of my expectations for RF. I know I would have graduated with a lot of debt if I would have chosen RF. For several years after I graduated from college, it seemed like all the RF grads that I met were complete snobs. It didn't matter if it was someone from the Seminary or someone that I taught with or a friend of a friend, they were snobs. One is the only girl I've ever met that knew so much about engagement/wedding rings without actually wearing one on her finger. The way she talked the ring was much more important than the guy! I tried very hard to not stereotype RF grads, but it just kept happening! I am so thankful that recently I have met a few RF grads that are not like that. I can think of two regular blog readers that are RF grads!
I don't know if anything in this blog post will help the Looper that asked the question, but it has been fun for me to write out my memories. I guess the biggest point I want to make is just because you think as a high school student that you know the perfect school for you, it may not end up to be the perfect school for you. God truly did have the perfect school picked for me and it wasn't the one I thought it was.
I studied very hard in school so I had very good grades. I was ranked 3rd in my class in high school until my final semester when I took calculus and physics (yes, I took these for fun!) dropped me to 5th in my class. I did not do fantastic on my ACT or SAT, but my class rank was enough for some colleges to notice. Ball State offered me a full ride of tuition. I didn't want to go there because it had the reputation of being a party school. Looking back, maybe I should have commuted from home and gone to school for free for a year or two.
My parents gave me a lot of freedom for college choice. Basically the only school I wasn't allowed to go to was Valpo because it's not Lutheran!
I applied for a lot of scholarships when I was in high school. I got a lot of small ($500) scholarships which all added up. I did best at ones like American Legion and local ones even though local was the second largest town in Indiana. If I remembered the deadline and applied each year of school, they would usually give me money each year too, even though it was only advertised for high school seniors. These local groups usually have money to give away but people don't apply for it or meet the deadline or have a nice typed letter or whatever reason.
I had gone to Art of Music camp at Concordia, River Forest a few summers while I was in high school. After this I had a fantasy view of Concordia, RF. I really wanted to go there. I wanted to be within walking distance of the city and sightsee Chicago and be part of their great Wind Ensemble and be part of their social life that I saw a small part of those summers at music camp. When the financial aid package came, RF gave me almost nothing. There was no way my parents could afford that kind of tuition.
My dad had worked out a family vacation while I was in high school so we had a tour of Concordia Wisconsin. It was ok, but not my dream school like RF. Right away 1/2 the tuition was paid with an academic scholarship and there were other small scholarships. The problem was it was 6 hours away from home and no one from our area, hardly anyone from our state went there. But the fact that I never had to go outside in the winter was very appealing. The buildings are all connected (dorms, cafeteria, chapel, library, classrooms, everything!)
It was embarrassing at the high school honors banquets to have no idea where I was going to college. Even on graduation day I still didn't know. The first born in me sat down and ran the numbers one more time a few days after graduation. It was obvious that financially CUW would work, RF no way. I tried calling RF and pleading with their financial aid office with not one more penny of success. I called CUW and told them I would be attending there in the fall. I returned a phone call to RF and told them I would be going to CUW and why.
A couple of days later, who should call but RF! How much did CUW give you? Would you still come to RF if we matched CUW? I was furious. I had just called a few days before and tried to work with them without any success. I told them no, I had already agreed to CUW.
It ended up that there were only 6 people from the entire state of Indiana that went to CUW when I was a freshman. I was the only flute in the wind ensemble when I was a freshman. I have no idea if I would have been good enough to even audition for the RF Wind Ensemble. The CUW band director talked a couple of other girls into coming to concerts a few times a year but for most of the year I was the entire flute section! The band director promised me we would go on tour before I graduated. We went to both New Orleans and Atlanta on tours before I graduated.
Financially, after scholarships, it was cheaper my freshman year of college to pay tuition and room and board than what my parents had paid the previous year for my Lutheran high school tuition. That is when I knew I had made the right decision to go to CUW.
My sophomore and junior years cost a little more as some scholarships were one time scholarships. My parents paid my tuition/room and board after scholarships for my first 3 years of college. I was on my own for my senior year because by that point they needed to also pay for my sister's Lutheran high school tuition. By this point college tuition had risen since my freshman year. Plus there were extra expenses of student teaching and graduation. The problem is that the financial aid office doesn't understand at all when your parents have been paying for you and now they won't. I got a very small student loan and had to scramble in my meager savings and do extra babysitting etc. to come up with the rest by the time it was due. I even remember I owed some the last semester and they warned me several times that I wouldn't get my diploma unless it was paid. Thankfully I paid everything on time and got out in 4 years! And I easily paid back my very small school loan the first year after I graduated.
Anyway, I had great friends and I'm really glad that I went to CUW. I'm afraid that I might have been disappointed if I would have picked RF because of my expectations for RF. I know I would have graduated with a lot of debt if I would have chosen RF. For several years after I graduated from college, it seemed like all the RF grads that I met were complete snobs. It didn't matter if it was someone from the Seminary or someone that I taught with or a friend of a friend, they were snobs. One is the only girl I've ever met that knew so much about engagement/wedding rings without actually wearing one on her finger. The way she talked the ring was much more important than the guy! I tried very hard to not stereotype RF grads, but it just kept happening! I am so thankful that recently I have met a few RF grads that are not like that. I can think of two regular blog readers that are RF grads!
I don't know if anything in this blog post will help the Looper that asked the question, but it has been fun for me to write out my memories. I guess the biggest point I want to make is just because you think as a high school student that you know the perfect school for you, it may not end up to be the perfect school for you. God truly did have the perfect school picked for me and it wasn't the one I thought it was.
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Sickness Update
All the Lambs are feeling better and Ram never got sick this round. Ram took Lamb 1 and 2 to ECFE this afternoon. It was his first time taking the boys to ECFE.
Ram made me go to the doctor because I still wasn't better after one week. The doctor agreed that I should be better from regular flu by now. She put me on antibiotics to hopefully help my cough and also help my possible ear infection. I had so much wax that she couldn't actually see my ear drum. In the old days (aka when I was a child) they would clean all that wax out. Now they don't want to disturb the possible ear infection nor risk putting a hole in the ear drum. I have memories of the pain of cleaning out the wax so I was happy we didn't have to do that today.
I took Lamb 3 with me to the doctor because he had not been without a fever for 24 hours so I didn't want to send him to ECFE. It made Ram's job to go to ECFE much easier without Lamb 3. Lamb 3 was scared of my nurse and doctor and afraid they were going to check on him.
This has all been more complicated because our previous doctor got burned out and moved away. It is difficult to be a doctor in this rural area. So we chose to go to a closer town with several doctors but one brand new female doctor. Our previous doctors since we moved here were all Asian. This new doctor graduated from high school when I graduated from college so she is just a few years younger than me. She grew up in this area and wanted to come home. I am hoping that we can stick with her as our doctor for awhile. It was a little strange going to the doctor today and not having to pay such close attention to her accent. I liked hearing English!
Ram made me go to the doctor because I still wasn't better after one week. The doctor agreed that I should be better from regular flu by now. She put me on antibiotics to hopefully help my cough and also help my possible ear infection. I had so much wax that she couldn't actually see my ear drum. In the old days (aka when I was a child) they would clean all that wax out. Now they don't want to disturb the possible ear infection nor risk putting a hole in the ear drum. I have memories of the pain of cleaning out the wax so I was happy we didn't have to do that today.
I took Lamb 3 with me to the doctor because he had not been without a fever for 24 hours so I didn't want to send him to ECFE. It made Ram's job to go to ECFE much easier without Lamb 3. Lamb 3 was scared of my nurse and doctor and afraid they were going to check on him.
This has all been more complicated because our previous doctor got burned out and moved away. It is difficult to be a doctor in this rural area. So we chose to go to a closer town with several doctors but one brand new female doctor. Our previous doctors since we moved here were all Asian. This new doctor graduated from high school when I graduated from college so she is just a few years younger than me. She grew up in this area and wanted to come home. I am hoping that we can stick with her as our doctor for awhile. It was a little strange going to the doctor today and not having to pay such close attention to her accent. I liked hearing English!
Homeschooling our Lambs
I have been sick and had extra time to think this last week. One thought is how guilty I feel that we have been sick and not accomplished very much in homeschooling since September. Then I look at blogs like this and try really hard not to compare myself to that. Unlike that blog, I don't keep any records except for writing my weekly blog report. Then Melrose made this comment. I think a big part of my problem is I am coming from a former Lutheran teacher viewpoint. Add to that, the school that I taught at taught classical Lutheran education.
We are still basically following our schedule that I made earlier this year. We try each morning to begin with Luther's Morning Prayer, say our Bible verse for the week (it's amazing how fast they learn it when you say it 3 times daily-that's all there is to it!), and write on the calendar (Lamb 1 checks the temperature, Lamb 2 checks what the weather looks like outside) and we record major events that we did the day before. When I announce it is time to begin, Lamb 3 is usually the first one to assemble and fold his hands ready to say Luther's Morning Prayer! Lamb 3 can't talk yet, but he "tells" us if we forget this important part of his daily routine.
Then I do math and handwriting with just Lamb 1. Lamb 2 and 3 play while I work with Lamb 1. Then we all sit in my big chair together and read lots together. Sometimes Lamb 3 also joins us, sometimes he goes off on his own and plays. We do Five in a Row now, read from My Book House, read poetry, and recite poetry. I'm getting ready to work on memorizing some Psalms with them for the poetry time after we worked on Robert Louis Stevenson poems for the first quarter. Then we do one lesson from The Ordinary Parent's Guide to Teaching Reading. Lamb 1 and 2 are doing this together. It works well to take turns sitting on Mama's lap for reading.
At this point they are in desperate need of playing OUTSIDE. Even if it's raining unless it truly is too cold or they are sick like recently, I "throw" them outside while I work on lunch. Sometimes they go with Ram to the post office.
After lunch they have chore time. They are responsible for putting away the silverware, emptying the recycling, and a few other chores. Then they have rest time. Lamb 1 doesn't sleep, but he is forced to have an hour by himself which gives me a much needed break. I know some homeschool mothers that work alone with older children now but I'm not at that point yet.
Then we have tea time. During tea time (sometimes while the tea is brewing, sometimes while they are eating) we listen to the Prima Latina CD. Then I read the Bible story to them. Then we sing the hymn that we are working on. Again, they learn the hymns really fast if we work on them daily. The last thing we do is listen to the Sing the Faith CD. I allow them to dance and sing during this as long as they are reciting the catechism. The motivation to do Latin and religion at this time of the day is when we are done, then they are free to play until near bedtime. I choose one bedtime story either history or science that I read to both of them together.
It took one quarter for us to get to this point to know what would work for us. I'm sure there will be much more working with the schedule and adding in more.
Melrose, I hope this answered your question. For my other readers, I've never met Melrose and I don't know much more about her other than she is another pastor's wife.
As homeschoolers, we always want to add more and more and more. But sometimes I need to relax and remember that my oldest Lamb is 5 1/2. There will be plenty of time to do First Language Lessons and Story of the World and Apologia Science and my list could go on and on. I think the best for Lamb 1 right now is to balance what we do in school with still giving him a chance to play. When I was teaching at the Lutheran school, the first graders I taught had been forced to grow up and no longer had time to play any more by the time they did the whole school day and then homework and then supper and then ready for the next day. Thank you Melrose, for giving me a chance to think through this again.
Baby steps: first get all healthy again, then get back to homeschooling until we take a long Christmas vacation. Then after Epiphany we'll get back into homeschooling and hopefully even add in a little more to the homeschool schedule.
We are still basically following our schedule that I made earlier this year. We try each morning to begin with Luther's Morning Prayer, say our Bible verse for the week (it's amazing how fast they learn it when you say it 3 times daily-that's all there is to it!), and write on the calendar (Lamb 1 checks the temperature, Lamb 2 checks what the weather looks like outside) and we record major events that we did the day before. When I announce it is time to begin, Lamb 3 is usually the first one to assemble and fold his hands ready to say Luther's Morning Prayer! Lamb 3 can't talk yet, but he "tells" us if we forget this important part of his daily routine.
Then I do math and handwriting with just Lamb 1. Lamb 2 and 3 play while I work with Lamb 1. Then we all sit in my big chair together and read lots together. Sometimes Lamb 3 also joins us, sometimes he goes off on his own and plays. We do Five in a Row now, read from My Book House, read poetry, and recite poetry. I'm getting ready to work on memorizing some Psalms with them for the poetry time after we worked on Robert Louis Stevenson poems for the first quarter. Then we do one lesson from The Ordinary Parent's Guide to Teaching Reading. Lamb 1 and 2 are doing this together. It works well to take turns sitting on Mama's lap for reading.
At this point they are in desperate need of playing OUTSIDE. Even if it's raining unless it truly is too cold or they are sick like recently, I "throw" them outside while I work on lunch. Sometimes they go with Ram to the post office.
After lunch they have chore time. They are responsible for putting away the silverware, emptying the recycling, and a few other chores. Then they have rest time. Lamb 1 doesn't sleep, but he is forced to have an hour by himself which gives me a much needed break. I know some homeschool mothers that work alone with older children now but I'm not at that point yet.
Then we have tea time. During tea time (sometimes while the tea is brewing, sometimes while they are eating) we listen to the Prima Latina CD. Then I read the Bible story to them. Then we sing the hymn that we are working on. Again, they learn the hymns really fast if we work on them daily. The last thing we do is listen to the Sing the Faith CD. I allow them to dance and sing during this as long as they are reciting the catechism. The motivation to do Latin and religion at this time of the day is when we are done, then they are free to play until near bedtime. I choose one bedtime story either history or science that I read to both of them together.
It took one quarter for us to get to this point to know what would work for us. I'm sure there will be much more working with the schedule and adding in more.
Melrose, I hope this answered your question. For my other readers, I've never met Melrose and I don't know much more about her other than she is another pastor's wife.
As homeschoolers, we always want to add more and more and more. But sometimes I need to relax and remember that my oldest Lamb is 5 1/2. There will be plenty of time to do First Language Lessons and Story of the World and Apologia Science and my list could go on and on. I think the best for Lamb 1 right now is to balance what we do in school with still giving him a chance to play. When I was teaching at the Lutheran school, the first graders I taught had been forced to grow up and no longer had time to play any more by the time they did the whole school day and then homework and then supper and then ready for the next day. Thank you Melrose, for giving me a chance to think through this again.
Baby steps: first get all healthy again, then get back to homeschooling until we take a long Christmas vacation. Then after Epiphany we'll get back into homeschooling and hopefully even add in a little more to the homeschool schedule.
Monday, November 9, 2009
Prayers for Stellan
If I understood MckMama's posts, there was only a 20% chance of what they were going to try with baby Stellan's heart would work during an ablation that was supposed to be scheduled tomorrow. Stellan almost died this morning before they moved the surgery time up to today.
Another doctor threw out a wild idea that worked and Stellan is SVT FREE now! Prince Charming missed his flight and won't be there until later. Stellan is not out of the woods yet, he needs more prayers as he recovers.
Praise God for the miracle the doctors were able to accomplish today with Stellan!
You can read the whole story here. Warning: You might want to have tissues handy before you read this!
Another doctor threw out a wild idea that worked and Stellan is SVT FREE now! Prince Charming missed his flight and won't be there until later. Stellan is not out of the woods yet, he needs more prayers as he recovers.
Praise God for the miracle the doctors were able to accomplish today with Stellan!
You can read the whole story here. Warning: You might want to have tissues handy before you read this!
Illness in children vs. adults
I was sick a lot as a child. I had tubes in my ears twice because of ear infections. I finally had my tonsils out when I was a freshman in high school after many rounds of strep throat. I lost count how many times I drank that yucky pink amoxicillan.
I have two vivid memories of being sick as a child.
1. I am a perfectionist. What I hated the most about being sick was I didn't have the energy to clean up my room. I laid in bed thinking-if I just felt well enough to pick up the dirty dishes (usually tea and toast that my mom delivered to me) and pick up the dirty tissues, this room would look SO much better... Sometimes my mom would "rescue" me and come do these little tasks for me and I would immediately feel better even if I didn't get better immediately.
I still am a perfectionist. Imagine how much these thoughts are magnified when the Lambs are also sick today. I sit on my chair and think-if I only had energy to pick up the toys that we didn't get picked up on Tuesday before we got sick, if only I had the energy to pick up the dirty tissues, if only I had the energy to do the dishes, this room would look SO much better... Thankfully Ram is not sick this time so he is able to rescue me a little bit from these thoughts like my mom used to do for me! I haven't been down to my laundry room since Tuesday and I refuse to go down there until I'm better.
2. My other memory is it seemed like I was always sick on the most beautiful weather days when I was a child. I hated being stuck inside when I could hear kids playing outside and hear people mowing the grass etc.
This feeling was magnified hundreds of times for me last week. It rained or snowed 27 out of 31 days in October. When we were sick we finally had some nice sunny days and some of the days were even in the 50s. I almost cried every time I had to answer one of them that we couldn't go outside while we were sick. We didn't take very many Halloween costume photos because of the cold rainy weather. It would have been the perfect opportunity to take photos last week but we were too sick.
I don't know which is more difficult, being the sick child or the sick adult? What do you think? One of my friends said she always feels bad when the mom is sick because then who takes care of mom? Thankfully Ram stayed healthy so he took care of us.
I have two vivid memories of being sick as a child.
1. I am a perfectionist. What I hated the most about being sick was I didn't have the energy to clean up my room. I laid in bed thinking-if I just felt well enough to pick up the dirty dishes (usually tea and toast that my mom delivered to me) and pick up the dirty tissues, this room would look SO much better... Sometimes my mom would "rescue" me and come do these little tasks for me and I would immediately feel better even if I didn't get better immediately.
I still am a perfectionist. Imagine how much these thoughts are magnified when the Lambs are also sick today. I sit on my chair and think-if I only had energy to pick up the toys that we didn't get picked up on Tuesday before we got sick, if only I had the energy to pick up the dirty tissues, if only I had the energy to do the dishes, this room would look SO much better... Thankfully Ram is not sick this time so he is able to rescue me a little bit from these thoughts like my mom used to do for me! I haven't been down to my laundry room since Tuesday and I refuse to go down there until I'm better.
2. My other memory is it seemed like I was always sick on the most beautiful weather days when I was a child. I hated being stuck inside when I could hear kids playing outside and hear people mowing the grass etc.
This feeling was magnified hundreds of times for me last week. It rained or snowed 27 out of 31 days in October. When we were sick we finally had some nice sunny days and some of the days were even in the 50s. I almost cried every time I had to answer one of them that we couldn't go outside while we were sick. We didn't take very many Halloween costume photos because of the cold rainy weather. It would have been the perfect opportunity to take photos last week but we were too sick.
I don't know which is more difficult, being the sick child or the sick adult? What do you think? One of my friends said she always feels bad when the mom is sick because then who takes care of mom? Thankfully Ram stayed healthy so he took care of us.
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